Our species accomplished a lot in the 200,000 years we were around. The Mona Lisa. Landing on the Moon. The Snuggie. But clearly, our time as masters of our domain is over; there is no question that today’s news represents the first clear and convincing sign that our species is doomed.
Rep. Michele Bachmann, R-Minn., is one of the 100 most influential humans alive.
There is quite simply nothing that can be said to redeem this. If Bachmann is in the 99.9999987th percentile of influential humans, then our species has clearly reached its endpoint. If Bachmann is one of the 100 people directing the course of humanity, we are not only being directed to our demise, but we clearly deserve to be.
Michele Bachmann would have too much power as a volunteer parent on a PTA. The reasons are legion — her bigotry, her zealotry, her tenuous grasp of the facts about literally anything, her abuse of power — these words don’t do justice to the kind of politician Bachmann is. She is the worst kind of leader: cock-sure, radical, unwilling to listen to anyone who disagrees with her. That she was a member of the Minnesota Senate was an affront to the institution. That she is a member of Congress is an affront to the nation.
That she has made this list? That is an affront to humanity, nature, and if there is one, to God. If she is truly among the best our species has to offer, then let our species perish; the cephalopods could scarcely do worse.