Here’s the latest unapproved comment on the “Male Privilege Checklist,” from someone named Madfoot713:
Sometimes I wonder if feminists will never be happy until I chop my penis off.
It’s generous of Madfoot713 to worry about our happiness. I actually spend a fair amount of time myself wondering “what would make me happy?,” and it’s good to know that I’m not the only person pondering this important question.
I admit, Madfoot713 chopping off his own penis has never occurred to me when I’ve wondered what would make me happy. But maybe I’ve been missing something? And even if Madfoot713 chopping off his own penis wouldn’t make me happy, what do other feminists think?
To help clarify the situation, I thought I’d post a poll.
[polldaddy poll=5440507]
Non-feminists, feel free to answer the poll as well — I’m sure Madfoot713 is just as eager to do whatever he can to make you happy, too.
If I read that Madfoot713 cut off his penis in a misguided attempt to make internet feminists happy, I would probably laugh. However, in general, my happiness has absolutely nothing to do with the state of Madfoot713’s genitals. For example, I just had a very happy weekend (I work strange hours, my weekends start on Wednesdays) and I didn’t even know Madfoot713 existed.
As long as Madfoot713 keeps his penis away from me, I don’t care whether he cuts it off. If reading about privilege makes him feel the need, maybe that’s the best thing to do.
Obviously, the only way to settle this scientifically is for Madfoot713 to cut off a tiny, carefully measured part of his penis, measure mean feminist happiness before and after, and repeat the experiment until we have sufficient data for or against the hypothesis that a Madfoot713 auto-penectomy has a positive effect upon the general happiness of feminists.
Hmm, even reading this discussion and having the opportunity to have my say in the matter made me mildly happy. I’d better vote yes, just in case.
Why didn’t more people vote for the humane alternative of having him cut off his ISP, rather than his penis, if he really needs to cut something?
I’d be happy to have his penis far away from me. Probably happier if it remained attached, because that would mean the talky bits would also need to be far away.
Well, NancyP, in my case I voted the way I did because I’m kind of an asshole.
I’m not sure that chopping his own penis off is enough to make feminists happy. There needs to be some humiliation and torture involved. Has madfoot713 spent any time with feminists? You’d think he’d know about the desire to torture and humiliate if he had even a passing familiarity with feminists.
Jake Squid, he did say “happy”, not “as happy as possible”.
Can feminists be happy without inflicting humiliating torture on men?
I don’t think so.