I’m not going to add much to what I’ve written about Penn State so far, at least not until more information comes out (and it most certainly will). But for those who are interested in a detailed timeline of what happened and when, asiangrrlMN has a great three-part primer over at Angry Black Lady Chronicles. (Part 1 is here, Part 2 is here, Part 3 is here.) I encourage people to read it, but do be warned that it is triggering, even for those of us fortunate enough not to have suffered abuse.
One thing I do want to highlight from her posts is this:
I want to share a resource for boys and men who have been sexually assaulted. It’s called 1in6.org, and it’s called that for a reason. 1 in 6 men have been sexually assaulted, and we don’t talk about it. Women who have been sexually assaulted have resources and support and can at least talk about it with some people. It’s still a terrible, difficult thing For men, there are different issues of shame and isolation and simply not having the resources. That’s why we have to talk about it and keep talking about it, screaming about it, really, even if people tell us to shut the fuck up. That is part of the reason I’m writing about the PSU outrage – we can’t afford to let this be a two-day wonder.
That is absolutely right. More women than men have suffered sexual abuse. But the number of men who have been abused, especially those abused as children, is still staggeringly and depressingly high. And they must be told, in no uncertain terms, that it was not their fault, that they did nothing wrong, and that all decent people support them unconditionally. Anyone who is raped or sexually assaulted is deserving of our support and compassion. And anyone who rapes or sexually assaults someone is deserving of our opprobrium. Gender is irrelevant to those statements.