I Give Up

Posted on October 31, 2008 by Jeff Fecke

barack-x.jpgI was going to try to come up with some sort of snarky rejoinder to this, but really, how could I? If I tried to argue that Barack Obama was the son of Lao Tzu and Booker T. Washington, I couldn’t come up with a more incomprehensible and bizarre argument than the one Pam Gellar came up with, arguing that Barack Hussein Super-Allah Karl Marx Gaius Baltar Benedict Arnold Adolf Mondale Hitler Obama Soetro Chirac IV is actually the illegitimate son of Malcolm X.

I mean, fuck me gently with a chainsaw, this is the most batshit crazy thing Atlas Pam has ever said, and she’s ATLAS PAM, fercripesake. I don’t know if I’d go so far as to join Jesse in declaring this the dumbest thing ever written, but it’s in the top ten.

I can’t wait for the next four years. By 2011, Barack Obama will be the secret love child of Bill Clinton, Al Sharpton, and Jane Fonda. Yes, all three. He will also be the Fifth Cylon, the man on the grassy knoll, and Bill Ayers himself, after extensive plastic surgery. It’s only gonna get more insane, folks. Buckle up.

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7 Responses to I Give Up

  1. Renee says:
    October 31, 2008 at 8:40 am

    When I read this ridiculous shit yesterday I just burst out laughing. There is ridiculous and then there is ridiculous…to all the glue huffers that believe this crap, get thee to rehab quick.

  2. Katai says:
    October 31, 2008 at 11:10 am

    Ah! “Fuck me gently with a chainsaw.” What is that from? I used to say that all the time in college.

    Heathers? Is it from Heathers?

    I apologize for this comment having nothing to do with the content of this post.

  3. Thene says:
    October 31, 2008 at 2:43 pm

    I just love seeing the straw-clutching, honestly. It’s not even election day and they’re already pinning their hopes for their ideological faction on conspiracy theories and scurrilous lawsuits. I think they’re in the ‘bargaining’ phase already.

  4. Myca says:
    October 31, 2008 at 3:22 pm

    Heathers? Is it from Heathers?

    Yup yup.

  5. Another Rachel says:
    October 31, 2008 at 6:41 pm

    I want her to go on proclaiming this from the hilltops. Let the wingnuts destroy their credibility. Do *any* self-described conservatives here want to defend someone with views like this?

  6. Pingback: Conservative Christians Send Emails Warning Barack Obama Is The Antichrist And The Second Coming Of Hitler | Prose Before Hos

  7. Lea says:
    November 4, 2008 at 1:30 pm

    Well, to be fair, he is clearly the Fifth Cylon. Unless it’s Starbuck. Either Starbuck or Obama, that’s for sure.

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