Virginity is the key to a young unmarried woman’s survival in many Middle Eastern cultures. The hymen is the focal point of the definition of virginity according to certain strict religious traditions such as fundamentalist Islam. In some areas of the Middle East, if it’s suspected that a young woman’s hymen has been broken or she has engaged in premarital sex, she can be considered a criminal and even face death. Though the hymen can be broken in other ways besides sexual intercourse, such as athletic activities or a tampon, in certain countries of the Middle East however a broken hymen before the wedding night means only premarital sex. Middle Eastern women who have broken hymens or no hymen are using surgery to create the illusion of being virginal before returning to the Middle East according to this Women’s eNews article. But the surgery creates a danger for both the women and the doctors who perform them.
LOS ANGELES (WOMENSENEWS)–Some doctors perform these specialized surgeries on women late at night when there’s no one else in the waiting room.
The patients are most often women of Middle Eastern descent, some with origins from countries such as Iran and Saudi Arabia. They frequently give false names and pay in cash. They arrive alone, faces hidden, under elaborate hats, wigs, scarves and sunglasses and, afraid, say doctors.
They are there for hymenoplasties, or the repair of hymens, which, when intact, are widely recognized as evidence of virginity. The surgeries could save their lives, noted the physicians who perform them, because, according to some interpretations of Islamic law, if a male relative suspects them of having premarital sex, the woman is a criminal. In some countries, such as Saudi Arabia and Nigeria, the penalty could be death.
Although for the most part, many of the women who seek these surgeries live in the U.S. with family members or to attend school, many return to their home countries when its time to look for a husband.
Doctors say that while there are no official statistics, they have seen an increase in requests for more hymen repair surgeries in recent years. In addition, more doctors are receiving threats.
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“Yes, there has been a degree of danger to doctors from fundamentalist groups who believe you are violating a law or culture. You can get in bit of trouble.”
Young also said that it’s not just women with Middle Eastern backgrounds seeking the surgeries. There has also been an increase in the number of women requesting hymen repair from both the Orthodox Jewish and Christian fundamentalist communities, as well as from women of all nationalities who want the surgery as a sexual enhancement.
“Within the fundamentalist Christian population as well there has been an apparent recent movement towards ‘traditional family values’ and there is pressure put on women to be virgins,” Young said.
Even though the hymen can be broken in other ways or some women simply aren’t born with one, but okay. Those wacky fundamentalists and their ideas of virginity and sluthood.
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Typical hymen repair surgery involves stitching the remnants of a torn hymen together and inserting a gelatin capsule that contains a blood-mimicking substance. After the hymen has been surgically repaired, a woman will bleed the fake blood the next time she has sexual intercourse. The surgery, which costs from $2,500 to $4,500, is performed on an outpatient basis. Healing can take from a few days to a few weeks.
Doctors Get Death Threats
The women who undergo the procedures are not the only ones who fear for their lives or well-being. A number of U.S. physicians who perform these surgeries have received death threats by some who identify themselves as Muslims.[…]
The threats to the doctors shadow the greater danger faced by women who undergo the surgery. Many live in fear of violence or honor killing, a practice in which a woman is murdered by her family members for supposedly shaming or tarnishing the family name with “unchaste” behavior. The practice occurs in traditional communities around the world, including the United States and Europe.
A report on honor killings by the Los Angeles-based Muslim Women’s League says that while sexual relationships outside of marriage are prohibited, honor killings are not a part of Islam.
“The problem of ‘honor killings’ is not a problem of morality or of ensuring that women maintain their own personal virtue; rather, it is a problem of domination, power and hatred of women who, in these instances, are viewed as nothing more than servants to the family, both physically and symbolically,” the report said.
The Islamic law of chastity before marriage does not distinguish between men and women. But women are often uniformly singled out for punishment of sexual crimes.
As there usually is no “punishment” or “crime” when men engage in premarital sex or sex outside of marriage. We can relate to this.
Dr. Laila Al-Marayati, communications director for the Muslim Women’s League and a gynecologist, says that women seek hymen-repair surgeries to cope with cultural pressures and not to comply with Islamic law, which does not stipulate a need to check a woman’s virginity.
“While Islam requires that both men and women be chaste before marriage; it doesn’t require women to prove it,” she said. “The need for surgery is because of the culture in some countries. Those same cultures do not require a man to prove his chasteness.”
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Fear of Reprisal
Many doctors interviewed who have heard about the threats or have been threatened themselves would only talk off the record to Women’s eNews for fear of reprisal. They did not want to advertise the fact that they perform the surgeries and said they like to keep a low profile on their work with hymen repair.Dr. David Matlock, a Beverly Hills gynecologist, was an exception. Matlock, who pioneered laser vaginal rejuvenation, said he has been performing hymenoplasties on hundreds of women for over 21 years. Most, he said, were of Middle Eastern descent.
He said he recently received death threats in the mail and his office has received numerous calls from men, identifying themselves as Muslims, who threatened to kill him and his office workers if he did not stop performing hymen repair.
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Southern California is home to a large number of people who have emigrated from Iran. Matlock noted that, while many of patients have lived in the U.S. for much of their lives, they still need to adhere to traditional practices and often undergo the surgery before looking for a husband.
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More Cautious Now
Miklos says colleagues have told him about receiving threats and he has been warned by the women coming in for the procedure. In recent months, he says, he has become more cautious himself. He no longer advertises the procedure in local newspapers and he said most of his business comes from personal referral.[…]
The fear these women and doctors face are very real, but sadly not surprising. The culprit is religious fundamentalism and the misogynist culture it creates. Though as the article mentioned, this is surgery and the demand for ‘the-hymen-proof-of-virginity’ is spreading into strict fundamentalist Christian communities here in the U.S., who are gaining more political and cultural influential power. The fear and possible violence and death these participants in this surgery face seem eerily similar to that of women’s clinics that perform abortions. The threats of violence and death are committed by zealous fundamentalists believing they are doing “God’s will” and pervert religious texts to justify their violence. But I suppose if women just “stop being sluts, stop using tampons, and stop engaging in any physical act that could break their hymen,” then all of this misogynist violence will just go away, right? And as I mentioned earlier we can relate to this inequity as we have yet to see real cultural and public shaming for men who come to the marriage bed unchaste or cause unintended pregnancies especially out-of-wedlock, in the same way women and girls endure all the time. The burden of sexual purity always lies heavily on women and girls and almost never on men and boys.
Many of the female suicide bombers who attack Israel are women who have been caught or suspected of engaging in extra-marital relationships, and are given the choice of an honor-killing or taking out as many Jews as they can. They are more easily caught apparently, as they are more fearful and less driven by blood lust. I have readso many horror stories, and it is the woman’s family that does this to her. I can’t understand how a mother or father or brother could do that to someone they love because another person made a claim against them. Testing for virginity is actually a step up I think. Women have been killed based on rumor and rumor alone–no proof, no evidence, no nothing The truth doesn’t even matter, rumor alone is enough to get her killed. I hope the surgeries help; it isn’t the answer, I’m not saying it is, but it is a bit of protection until there are drastic changes in the world.
i lived in south korea back in 2001, and while i was there, i learned that hymen replacement surgery was a common practice over there. i had it described to me as a “pretty surgery” for girls to have before their weddings if they’d “made any mistakes” before their wedding day. the korean women who told me this saw nothing unusual about it at all. i tried to find an appropriate link, but this was all i could find.
Well, don’t blame me. I have so far stayed pure for my future wife, whoever she may be (I’m 26 right now).
This was on an episode of Dr. 90210, minus the death threats. I’m very glad to see that there are ways around this asinine custom.
If I was one of these doctors, here’s what I would say to anyone sending these death threats: “I am not the one who is wrong; you are. I am saving innocent people from the risk of being murdered. It is not my fault that your culture does something so evil.”
The “If suspected, she’s guilty” idea is one of the most obscenely stupid customs I’ve ever heard of.
Here’s an article from the Middle East Forum online about honor killings in the ME. It’s long, but worth reading for a better understanding of the topic.
The sheer, sick sadism of it–not only do they want to make it look like someone is hurt and bleeding all over the place, it sounds like they feel obliged to make sure some actual physical trauma occurs. (recalls inept nurse removing staples after surgery on chest) All right, I couldn’t stand to read the full article, excuse me if I misread something, but that’s what it sounds like, that and stuff I ran onto somewhere back. You’d think a doctor could figure out rig up something that’d look, sound and feel spectacular to the man–maybe have a bunch of confetti fly out–but be imperceptible to the woman. Heck, for that kind of money there ought to be a reset button and fireworks.
Seriously, though, the whole thing is just too sickening for me to go into any farther, and I can only hope for those drastic changes to come soon.
By the way, how come books and websites for young girls here in the US–even those that seem feminist and pro-sexual-freedom–don’t get more explicit on how to make sure that no pain, bleeding, etc., happpens when they start having sex? They say it might or might not happen but they don’t say how to prevent it–when they are preventive enough about all the other dangers of sexual activity–at least the ones I’ve looked at have a sort of blank spot there. I can’t see letting that happen to anyone I care about. Let’s clean up our own back yard too.
Great blog, by the way.
I remember noticing that years ago — I actually tried to find information on women’s virginity and how to make that transition less unpleasant. I couldn’t find more than a sentence or two on the subject anywhere. A few books said explicitly that for anyone reading the book, virginity would be a distant memory.
In a decent society, it’s exactly the sort of subject sexual education *would* cover. But no, we’ve got the dual messages that teens mustn’t have sex, but adults are already sexually experienced, and the transition between the two states is never to be discussed.
I agree – more information should be readily available regarding how to make the losing of virginity for the female less painful. I’m a 19yr old virgin myself (and a girl) and I squirm when I think that some day I’ll have sex and probably bleed… it’s scary. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not anti-sex or anything – a part of me is rather impatient about my virginity (religious reasons) but some day it will happen, and that scares me. There should be information available to ease the anxieties of people like me and others.
PS: crazy pseudo Islamic hymen politics is primitive and scary too.
I belive that we middle eastern girls have the right to have the hymen surgury. I am also a patient of the practice and i decended from afghanistan. Alot of afghan girls act lik they are not virgins, i swear probably half the population of afghan or iranian girls are not virgins. This surgery wil help us all now ALL you low life stupid fundamentalists stop getting n our business and get your acts together. thak you
Rancho Cucamonga California
Well, I think going through the whole F***** up surgery will make a girl’s life become no more than a lie to her ownself & whoever her husband is going to be…and she will have to live in totol denial for the rest of her life….I think if a girl is planning to get married to a man who is not the same man who broke her virginity, she should be sure enough that he will accept her the way she is…. and if the question does pop up like “Hey hun, I want to make sure, are you a virgin?” she should answer “why hun, are u?” The double standard thing should burn in hell…
Dear Persia Girl,
First of all I would like to tell you that I’m proud of your courage to tell this on the net.
You know, I don’t agree with you that 50% of the Afghan girls are not a virgin. Perhaps this is true in the California Afghan society you live in. But please don’t generalise it. Virginity is the most precious thing a bride gives to her husband on the weddingnight. I know that the womensright acivists would think differently… But I cherish the Afghan tradition and culture. I do agree that the boy also should be a virgin on the weddingnight.
Concerning the surgery: I think starting your married life with a lie is not a good thing to do. I live in the Netherlands where I grew up and did my school, MD and surgery residency. Specially in cities like Amsterdam and Rotterdam there are a lot of Turkish, maroccan and iranian girls who come for this kind of operation. I to perform it, it really hurts me inside. Cause I help someone decieve someone else. That is a sin in islam, christian and jewish religion!!!
Anyway,
If you think you can have a good marriage after doin such an operation, then it is your choice and your life. May good help my Afghan sisters stay on the right path and keep the Afghan pride alive.
Good bless you all.
The Afghan Surgoen
I am half-iranian and half-english. Please everyone just pull back and look at the human side of this bullshit about who is a virgin and who is not. I have been to Iran as a child and for the rest of my life I live in the United Kingdom. People who worry about such a petty thing as virginity need to grow up and get a life. For God’s sake people are at war and dying every single day worldwide yet we still concer ourselves with such outdated nonsense. This is the 21st century and regardless of religious beliefs every individual has the right to live their life in the way that is best for themselves. Surely we must all try to remember that when two peoples hearts are united in love and they want to get married then what has gone before (in terms of past sexual activity really ceases to be important). For the record I was born a Muslim but I attend Christian church services with my mother because I love God. We would all do well to remember that Allah is merciful and kind so lets stop persecuting women because they have chosen to have sex. It is not as though they are serial killers. I am appalled at these virginity restoring operations. They are fake and nasty–never the good foundation for married life.
PEACE AND LOVE TO ALL PEOPLE WORLDWIDE LET LOVE HARMONY AND PEACE TAKE CONTROL DOWN THIS BULLSHIT OPPRESSION OF FEMALE SEXUALITY,IF U DON’T LIKE THE WAY WOMEN LIVE THEIR LIVES THEN DO THEM A FAVOUR AND SET THEM FREE FROM YOUR CRAP IN OTHER WORDS FUCK U IF U CANT ACCEPT ME FOR WHO AM I. GOD LOVES US ALL WE WERE CREATED IN HIS IMAGE HOLD ONTO LOVE AND LOVING THOGUHTS DO GOOD AND DON’T WORRY ABOUT MINOR LITTLE BITS OF STUFF
PEOPLE LOVE FAMILY FRIENDS AND GOD, LIVE AND GOOD LIFE,IT MAY BE HARD BUT FOR THE GOOD ONES HEAVEN WILL COME.LET US ALL TRY TO NOT BE SO HARD ON ANOTHER BECAUSE SURELY HUMAN LIVES ARE PROBLEMATICAL ENOUGH ALREADY?
I’m also Iranian and I have a boyfriend i’m not a virgin and I have sexual relatioships in the past. I want to be brave and say I’M NOT ASHAMED .my sexuality is part of me and my enjoyment as being a a woman. I will never have such stupid surgery.if my boyfriend or future husband can’t accept it its not gonna work. Because I’m a hu?an being my virginty doesn’t define me. I wish all iranian girls would be brave and tell this to their fiance or husbands.also ask yourthem if they are also virgins???its only a fair question.Girls should have sexual relationship before marriage b/c it will help herin her marriage trust me.enjoy your self don’t feel gulity.this is the W