This cartoon was drawn by Nadine Scholtes.
Popular cartoonist John Allison is a big fan of the character Conan the Barbarian, and was doing a Conan comic for fun in his free time, which you could read for free on his website. I say “could” and not “can,” because Allison understandably took it down after receiving a cease and desist letter from Conan Properties International.
Allison lives and works in the UK, where Conan is in the public domain. But in the US, Conan is copyrighted until 2028. John Allison is a busy creator with a lot of projects he has time for and, I suspect, not much money to pay for being sued, even if the lawsuit has no merit. In contrast, Conan Properties International, because they create nothing and do nothing but live off the most popular creation of a writer who died in 1936, has nothing but time and money to use to harass creators like Allison.
This isn’t the only specious and annoying lawsuit that Conan’s owners have undertaken because they’re leaches who have nothing else to do with their time. The wonderful cartoonist Shaenon Garrity wrote:
The Conan rights holders are bonkers litigious. Viz had to change the title of the manga Detective Conan because they threatened to sue. The Conan in the manga is named after Arthur Conan Doyle, a real person who predates Conan the Barbarian.
This sort of copyright bullying is unfortunately very common, and happens with many characters and creations other than Conan. But the Conan story happened to be the one that inspired this cartoon.
Nadine, who lives in Luxembourg and is significantly younger than me, actually didn’t know who “Conan” was and assumed she was just free to make up a character design from scratch, which caused some confusion for me when I saw her first sketches. We worked it out. :-) The Conan she eventually drew is recognizably Conan – but also kind of adorable and lithe compared to how the character is usually drawn.
The script suggested that Conan could be riding a horse or maybe a bear, but also said Nadine could change it to whatever she wanted. Nadine chose to make it a drake, which is a kind of dragon.
TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON
This cartoon has four panels. Each of the panels shows Conan the Barbarian, a shirtless, muscular barbarian dude with long hair, in a desert. He is carrying an axe and a shield.
PANEL 1
Conan, mounted on his drake (drakes are a kind of dragon; this one has four limbs and no wings), is under attack. Arrows fly through the air at him, and a couple of arrows are stuck in the shield that Conan has raised defensively. The drake has a panicked expression as it speaks.
DRAKE: Conan, we’re surrounded! What will we do?
CONAN: We will kill or we will die.
VOICE FROM OFF PANEL: STOP!
PANEL 2
Conan, carrying his axe, has gotten off his drake and is walking towards a new character, a man wearing glasses and a modern suit and tie. The main is reading off a piece of paper he’s holding. We’ll just call this character “LAWYER,” since that’s what he is.
LAWYER: On behalf of Conan Properties International, this is a cease and desist letter. You do not have permission to create this comic strip.
CONAN: Wrong, fool! I’m public domain in this country!
PANEL 3
With a smug expression, the Lawyer holds up the piece of paper for Conan to read. Conan leans down to read it, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.
LAWYER: Even if that’s so, we’ll still sue, and proving your case would take years and bankrupt you. That’s why we always win.
CONAN: Hmm…. I’ve got an idea.
PANEL 4
Conan is holding the lawyer’s decapitated head in one hand. Blood drips out of the bottom of the lawyer’s neck, and we can see his headless body lying on the ground in the background. In Conan’s other hand is a bloody axe, which Conan is dropping in surprise.
The lawyer speaks, an annoyed expression on his face. Conan reacts with shock and fear.
LAWYER: This really isn’t helping your case.
CONAN: By Crom! How are you STILL talking?
LAWYER: I’m a lawyer.
CHICKEN FAT WATCH
“Chicken Fat” is an old-fashioned cartoonist expression for what we might now call “Easter Eggs”: unimportant but hopefully amusing details the cartoonist sticks in.
In panel 1, one of the arrows that has landed on the ground appears to have a love letter wrapped around it.
In panel 2, the Drake is suddenly wearing a watch, which it checks impatiently.
In panel 4, the Drake is fearfully making a cross with its forefingers. Also, a vulture has shown up and is eyeing the corpse; the vulture is wearing a napkin tied around its neck.
As always, excellent work from the two of you! I like that the joke here is substantially different from “Shakespeare vs Copyright.”
Thank you! And I was consciously trying to do a different approach here, so thanks for noticing.
While I would expect that you would know, in general terms, about what has been happening in the UK in recent weeks, perhaps you were not aware of this particular aspect.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/ckgww4z8zx7o