The date of the fake wedding has been set! It’s September 23rd. You’re invited, so please come! And bring your friends! Or, really, bring anyone who is reasonably unlikely to violently attack me or the church building. I’m not fussy.
What’s a fake wedding? Just what it sounds like. We’re going to pretend to put on a wedding. It’s sort of a role-playing game; everyone plays a part, and together we’ll throw the worst wedding of all time. Should be fun.
The wedding will take place in downtown Portland, at The Old Church (corner of 11th and Clay), at 6:30pm. A brief and (I hope) disastrous reception to follow.
UPDATE: Read the list of possible roles here.
Please leave comments if you think you can attend!
This sounds hilarious and awesome. Wish I still lived in Portland.
GAWD I am so tempted to get a plane ticket and come to this.. I only heistate because as a wedding photographer my ego is only as big as a small muncipality not quite a big city yet… that and the plane ticket was astronomical.
If I weren’t starting a new job the week before AND broke from job transition financial problems, I’d love to come. To meet a bunch of people I only “know” through the blog if nothing else. Plus I have a kid who’d love to play an extra flower girl if you’re in need of spares. Unfortunately, I don’t want to get fired a week into my new job…want to take your performance on the road? A stop in NYC is always fashionable…
If you need a lab coat, I can provide a prop. It’s well-used, though.
I would like to play Sandra Bullock’s character (whose name of course escapes me) at the beginning of 28 days when, as the sister of the bride, she gives a horribly insulting toast, knocks over the cake, goes to get a new cake, and crashes into a house.
Or maybe the ex-girlfriend near the end of While You Were Sleeping (yes, I like Sandra Bullock movies, so sue me), preferably incorporating the earlier scene where the non-groom demands that she pay him back for all her various bodily enhancements.
Or… no, you already have a minister (“mawwiage is what bwings us togevah today”).
All of this is academic, sadly, as I too live too far away and have other commitments.
Ooh, ooh, can I be the groom’s ex-lover, who shows up just before the vows to break his pray-away-the-gay conditioning with one long, passionate, only-slightly-consensual kiss, and then runs off with him to the Castro leaving the entire wedding party in tears, except for that one antisocial guy playing the Christian Slater role sitting in the back?
Edit: Because I figure there is a small but nonzero chance that you will say “yes”, I should point out that I won’t actually be able to make it.
man, I want to be the crazy aunt who stands up during the ceremony to give a rant about how everybody else is ruining the bride’s Perfect Day. but I can’t make it either…
you gotta tell us how it all turns out!
What about the veiled woman standing in the back who’s the real mother of the bride, not the imposter on the wedding invite list? And every scene she’s in, they play mysterious violin music.
Not to mention the groom’s evil twin brother who has been in hiding all these years.
Ooh, I want to object! I’ve always wanted to object!
I wish I weren’t 3000 miles away!
God, I wish I could go to this. It’d be the first wedding I actually want to go to.
I am *so* tempted.
So come! What part would you like to play?
I’ll have to check and make sure I don’t have plans, and that I can make it from work fast enough.
I think I’m too young for a lot of these, but I’d prob’ly go for the minister’s angry ex or a bridesmaid, come down to it.
If I wasn’t several thousand miles away, I’d totally be there. Sounds awesome.
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Oh, I am SO there.
I can pull off the creepily young stepmother of the groom, in a too-short dress, trying to be everybody’s best friend. Or, if that’s taken, I think I still have a pretty awesomely weird bridesmaid’s dress from the last wedding I was in…
i’m definitely interested… can i be the minister’s ex even though i’m a dude? i think that’d add to the hilarity/randomness… i actually live in portland and can make it, too!
love the idea either way.
I’m game. I’ve got a scientist-y white lab coat, and my husband can supply the camera and ego :)
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